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November 21 - November 28, 2003 

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September 11, 2001

 What the Critics Are Saying About See Span Run:


"... a cutthroat look at current issues... The writing is clever and worth checking out."
               --NBCi 


"Political Site of the Day!"
               --Aboutpolitics.com


"A total piece of shit!"
       --Sharon H. Devinney,
          Cyberspace Surfer

ACLU  Praises New Boy Scouts of America  Leader

The American Civil Liberties Union is praising the newly appointed president of the Boy Scouts of America, saying in a press statement that Marion Ett possesses "all the qualities" the ACLU looks for in a youth leader.  Ett's nomination to lead the Boy Scouts has run into major snags recently as opponents have argued that he looks too much like embattled singer Michael Jackson, but that argument doesn't hold much water, in the eyes of the ACLU.  "Mr. Ett has a long and distinguished record of not going to church, which makes him very appealing," said ACLU spokesman I.M. Secular.  "And there is absolutely no proof he has ever molested any boys, either, though that alone should not be grounds to have his nomination denied."  As for Ett himself, he squeaked, "I'm not a puppet!  I'm a real boy!"   

Honorable Judge Roger Ebert To Reside Over Jackson Case 

The distinguished Judge Roger Ebert has been appointed to oversee the upcoming Michael Jackson child molestation trial, Court TV is reporting.  Ebert is known by many trial observers as a "thumbs up or down" judge with a firm courtroom style, who leaves very little doubt about where he stands on certain motions put forth by prosecution and defense attorneys alike.  Jackson's attorneys criticized the appointment of Ebert, saying that he was unusually blunt and unfair in his criticism during the Free Willy trial several years ago...

Dems Blame Bush For JFK Assassination

Conspiracy theorists from the Democratic National Party are pushing a new explanation for the assassination of John F. Kennedy 40 years ago this week:  George W. Bush.  "Bush was in Texas at the time!" screeched Democratic presidential frontrunner Howard Dean.  "Can he account for his whereabouts on Nov. 22, 1963?"  When informed that Bush was seventeen years-old and snoozing in a Geometry class in Midland, TX -- 316 miles away from Dallas -- at the time of the assassination, Dean shot back, "Show us the proof!  The administration won't turn over any records documenting the President's whereabouts at that time.  How do we know he didn't play hooky on that ill-fated Friday?"  When it was suggested that this latest Bush conspiracy theory was perhaps the most far-fetched of all, Dean's notorious vein that zig-zags across his forehead began to pulsate.  "If this president can use flawed intelligence and take us to war against someone as harmless as Saddam Hussein, he's capable of doing anything!"  Dean was then injected with a tranquilizer, causing him to calm down considerably...